*CONTEST* Afghanistan: The Pity of War

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Afghanistan: The Pity of War

Start date: 07 August 2010
End date: 01 October 2010

Prizes: (These are the prizes offered after a day, list will possibly double in size)

1st Place -

1000 Points, courtesy of Penessence
1000 Points, courtesy of tina-go-lightly
A DD Suggestion
A DLD Suggestion
A Critique, courtesy of li1121  
A Critique, courtesy of Christianonfire7
A Critique, courtesy of MUSiiCxMANiiAC
Journal Features, courtesy of:
FayetteAethelwyne
invizygirl
mountae-stock
Tuttlebird  
MUSiiCxMANiiAC
Penessence

2nd Place-
2 Critiques, courtesy of Penessence
Journal Features, courtesy of:
FayetteAethelwyne
invizygirl
mountae-stock
Tuttlebird  
MUSiiCxMANiiAC
Penessence

3rd Place-
Journal Features, courtesy of:
FayetteAethelwyne
invizygirl
mountae-stock
Tuttlebird  
MUSiiCxMANiiAC
Penessence

A great interest of mine is the Poetry of the First World War.
In a more poetry-literate age than our own* it was to be expected that when faced with death in the deep mud of the trenches, a generally more capable generation of writers would pen at least some immortal truth about what war was.
Foremost among those writers are the giants Sigfried Sassoon, Robert Graves, and Wilfred Owen. However their are scores of others you may have heard of, for example e.e.cummings, who wrote of WWI 'my sweet old etcetera'.
This contest however is going to be concerned with the theme of Wilfred Owen- that being 'the pity of war'.
The war I would like your poem to focus on is the war in Afghanistan.
Here is an example of what you'll be competing with by Owen:

Anthem for Doomed Youth

What passing-bells for these who die as cattle?
   Only the monstrous anger of the guns.
   Only the stuttering rifles' rapid rattle
Can patter out their hasty orisons.
No mockeries for them; no prayers nor bells,
Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs, --
The shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells;
And bugles calling for them from sad shires.

What candles may be held to speed them all?
   Not in the hands of boys, but in their eyes
Shall shine the holy glimmers of goodbyes.
   The pallor of girls' brows shall be their pall;
Their flowers the tenderness of patient minds,
And each slow dusk a drawing-down of blinds. </i>

You however, have a distinct advantage. You are not stuck in a trench, and you have a word processor. Furthermore soldiers are desensitised, and you are not.
I think in this case it is possibly an advantage not being present at the war. All of us anyway recieve a constant stream of media about Afghanistan, usually soldier deaths, friendly fire and the like.

So now for the vital stats of the contest

Judging criteria:

Form - You can write it however you want, short lines, long lines. etc. I am judging (sadly) and I will say that I am a fan of simplicity and rhyme (but not over the top).

Language - Above all keep it relevant to the modern reader, concise, and try and make every word worth a thousand. e.g. this WW2 poem by me: fav.me/d29njcg

Originality - I personally have churned out some pretty maudlin (miserably sentimental) pieces about war, but I'd rather entries focused on the humanity of both sides and were more subtle. This will actually probably result in people feeling a deeper seated despair when they read your entry anyway.

Technique - So as I just said, lets not go over the top with emotional language, it should build throughout and be perfect in the closing lines.

All entries must include a link to this news article (so bookmark it) in their artist comments. Entries will not be accepted until you do this.

All entries must be written after the date of this article being published.

Send links to entries by note to me (Penessence), you may enter one piece only.